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  Kids Jokes
  • Why is the letter "G" scary?
    It turns a host into a ghost.

  • What did Bacon say to Tomato?
    Lettuce get together.

  • How do you know when there's an elephant under your bed?
    Your nose touches the ceiling!

  • What starts with T, ends with T and is full of T?
    A teapot.

  • Did you hear about the magic tractor?
    It went down the road and turned into a field

  • What do you call a fly with no wings?
    A walk.

  • What did one ball say to the other ball?
    Nothing - he just looked round

  • Where do fortune tellers dance?
    At the crystal ball.

  • What did the necktie say to the hat?
    You go on ahead. I'll hang around for a while.

  • What is at the end of everything?
    The letter G.

  • How do you keep your hair dry in the shower?
    Don't turn the water on.

  • What do you call a pirate with two eyes and two legs?
    A rookie.

  • Why did the elephant eat the candle?
    He wanted a light snack!

  • Where do polar bears put their money?
    In snow banks.

  • How does a skeleton call his friends?
    On a telebone!

  • What kind of cattle laugh?
    Laughingstock.

  • How does the teacher read schoolwork?
    With her pupils.

  • What is the saddest bird?
    A blue jay.

  • Why does a hummingbird hum?
    It doesn't know the words.

  • What is the most valuable fish?
    Goldfish.

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