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  • Why are some fish at the bottom of the ocean?
    Because they dropped out of school.

  • What horses keep late hours?
    Nightmares.

  • What do you get if you cross a chicken and a poodle?
    Pooched eggs.

  • What is a sleeping bag?
    A knapsack.

  • Why do dogs wag their tails?
    Because nobody else will do it for them.

  • What do wooden whales eat?
    Plankton.

  • Did you hear about the wooden car with the wooden wheels and the wooden engine?
    It wooden go.

  • What is a very hard subject?
    The study of rocks.

  • What happened when the cow jumped over the barbed wire fence?
    Udder destruction.

  • Why did the cat cross the road?
    To get away from the dog.

  • What streets do ghosts haunt?
    Dead ends.

  • Why was the baby ant so confused?
    Because all of his uncles were ants.

  • What happened when the dog went to the flea circus?
    He stole the show.

  • What kind of dog does Dracula have?
    A bloodhound.

  • What do you call a chicken at the North Pole?
    Lost.

  • What did the fish say when he swam into the wall?
    Dam.

  • What do you call an alligator in a vest?
    An investigator.

  • What is a lifeguard's favorite game?
    Pool.

  • How does a pig go to hospital?
    In a hambulance.

  • What did the stamp say to the envelope?
    Stick with me and we will go places!

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