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  Kids Jokes
  • What grows up while growing down?
    A goose.

  • Did you hear about the bear that was hit by an 18-wheeler and splattered all over the place?
    They said it was a grizzly accident.

  • What kind of music does a mummy sing in the shower?
    Wrap.

  • Why was the pencil crying?
    Because he was pointless.

  • Have you heard the joke about the butter?
    I can't tell you because you will spread it.

  • What do you call an annoying vampire?
    A pain in the neck.

  • How do eels taste?
    Shocking.

  • What do you call a penguin in the desert?
    Lost.

  • What did the grape do when the elephant sat on it?
    It let out a little wine.

  • What is fastest, hot or cold?
    Hot, you can catch a cold.

  • Where did the spaghetti go to dance?
    The meat ball.

  • What goes "ha, ha, plop"?
    Someone laughing their head off.

  • What goes "boo hoo, splat"?
    Someone crying their eyes out.

  • Why did the balloon burst?
    Because it saw the lollypop.

  • What kind of bow can't be tied?
    A rainbow.

  • Why did the boy eat his homework?
    The teacher said it was a piece of cake.

  • Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?
    It's ok, he woke up.

  • What has four legs but can't run?
    A table.

  • Why couldn't the chicken find her eggs?
    Because she mislaid them.

  • What did the ocean say to the pirate?
    Nothing, it just waved.

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