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  Kids Jokes
  • What do you call an annoying vampire?
    A pain in the neck.

  • How do eels taste?

  • What do you call a penguin in the desert?

  • What did the grape do when the elephant sat on it?
    It let out a little wine.

  • What is fastest, hot or cold?
    Hot, you can catch a cold.

  • Where did the spaghetti go to dance?
    The meat ball.

  • What goes "ha, ha, plop"?
    Someone laughing their head off.

  • What goes "boo hoo, splat"?
    Someone crying their eyes out.

  • Why did the balloon burst?
    Because it saw the lollypop.

  • What kind of bow can't be tied?
    A rainbow.

  • Why did the boy eat his homework?
    The teacher said it was a piece of cake.

  • Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?
    It's ok, he woke up.

  • What has four legs but can't run?
    A table.

  • Why couldn't the chicken find her eggs?
    Because she mislaid them.

  • What did the ocean say to the pirate?
    Nothing, it just waved.

  • Why shouldn't you go outside if it's raining cats and dogs?
    Because you might step in a poodle!

  • What do you get from a pampered cow?
    Spoiled milk.

  • How many words are in The English Dictionary?

  • What are two things you can't have for lunch?
    Breakfast and dinner.

  • Why did the computer need glasses?
    To fix his web sight.

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