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  Kids Jokes
  • How do you stop a snake from striking?
    Pay it decent wages.

  • Why was the mushroom invited to lots of parties?
    Because he was a fungi to be with.

  • What did one elevator say to the other elevator?
    I think I'm coming down with something.

  • Did you hear the joke about the roof?
    Never mind, it's over your head.

  • What do you call a bear with no teeth?
    A Gummy Bear.

  • What do you call a bear with no ear?
    A B.

  • What happens to a frog's car when it breaks down?
    It gets toad away.

  • Why did the teddy bear not eat his breakfast?
    Because he was already stuffed.

  • What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for college?
    Bison.

  • What kind of rocks are never found in the ocean?
    Dry ones.

  • What do you give a dog for a fever?
    Mustard, it's the best thing for a hot dog.

  • What do you call a camel with no humps?
    Humphrey.

  • What's worse than finding a worm in your apple?
    Finding half a worm.

  • What does a dentist call his x-rays?
    Tooth-pics.

  • Why was six afraid of seven?
    Because 7 ate 9.

  • What has 4 wheels and flies?
    A garbage truck.

  • What do you get when you pour hot water down a rabbit hole?
    Hot cross bunnies.

  • What letters are not in the alphabet?
    The ones in the mail, of course.

  • What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence?
    Time to get a new fence.

  • How can a leopard change his spots?
    By moving.

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