- Which side of a chicken has the most feathers?
- Why was the piano on the porch?
Because he forgot his keys.
- What do lawyers wear to court?
- What kind of paper can you tear?
Terrible (tearable) paper.
- What do you get when you cross an elephant with a fish?
- Where did the king keep his armies?
In his sleevies.
- What is the only food that they serve on planes?
Plain food, of course.
- Why is England the wettest country?
Because the queen has reigned there for years.
- How did the barber win the race?
He knew a short cut.
- What did the digital clock say to it's mom?
Look ma, No hands.
- Why were the Grecian scientists so large?
They discovered pi.
- Why does your sister jump up and down before taking her medicine?
Because the label says: Shake well before using!
- Why is Basketball such a messy sport?
Because you dribble on the floor.
- How do you communicate with a fish?
Drop him a line.
- What did the leopard say in the shower?
That really hits the spot.
- What did one toilet say to the other toilet?
You look flushed.
- What is a table you can eat?
- What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back?
- Where do baby trees go to school?
To a tree nursery.
- How did the farmer mend his pants?
With cabbage patches.