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Today was my birthday.

Dear Aiden, I really love you and care about you-more than you could possibly know. Every day I was glad to listen to your stories and hear about your day. I would do anything for you. But today - Today was my birthday. And you didn't even call. Today, for once, I don't even want to hear about what you did. Today was my birthday. And you forgot. That's how it is right now. You don't even care about me. I am nothing to you. You were my everything. Love always


I am married and hes with my best friend

First let me give you some history. I have known Xavier since I was 5 yrs old our families were close and all of us kids grew up together there was 8 of us I was the only girl. We were all about the same age give or take a few yrs. I had a crush on Xavier from the beginning but of course never said anything. When we got older like 13 14 yrs old I sensed maybe he liked me too. But of course nothing was said, one day when i was 15 I was at his house and I called my boyfriend at the time Daniel who broke up with me so I was sad Xavier tried to cheer me up he put on the radio and we were dancing then a slow jam came on LL COOL J singing hey lover we were dancing real close but me in my scared little mind pulled back and told him i was sleepy, We never said anything about 3 months later he got locked up and he decided to tell me how he felt I would go see him write to him all that eventually he was sentenced to 8 yrs in prison I was 15 he was 17. I did kkep up the writing 4 a while too then I was 17 I met the man who is now my husband Eddie. When I was 18 I met the girl who is now my best friend she also was at the time Xaviers cousin Juans girl. Well ME AND HER GOT PREG AT TH SAME TIME AND GREW CLOSE FAST FORWARD NOW i AM 27 YRS OLD...i HAVE 3 KIDS she has 2 i stayed with Eddie she left Juan. Well Xavier got out of prison when I was 23 and came to my house I told him i loved eddie and avoided him at all costs and me and my best friend had a falling out when i was 22 somehow now shes with Xavier and we are all friends. The whole little crew ya know the 8 of us that have known each other for 22 yrs told me that Xavier still loved me I refused to believe but after spending time with him those old feeling came rushing back and somehow it started with a stolen kiss here and there till we finally got together and now I am so confused I do love Eddie but I am not sure if its just love of being with him 4 10yrs or if i am still in love with him but I do know I cant stop thinking of xavier. What am I gonna do?


Obsessed with Naomi Watts

I am completly obsessed with her. When i go to bed, i imagine she is in there with me. I have got loads of pics of her on my phone and computer. Everytime i see a picture of her boyfriend, i feel like punching the picture.


threw out

I threw the keys to my filing cabinet in the dumpster becauase I was looking at my keychain while walking down the street one day and I was wondering what the hell they were for. I thought they were keys to an old bike lock. I'm so stupid, now I have to get a new filing cabinet. Thankfully my filing cabinet was unlocked though at the time I threw them out.


Scared to move on with my life

I have been with my husband for close to 6 years now. When I married him I really didn't want to get married again. Since we have been married, we have had 2 beautiful daughters who are 5 and 3. I do not love my husband. During a recent trip to FL, I cheated on him with an old friend from HS and fell for the guy. I am now secretly stealing money out of our account for plans to move back to FL where I am from. I am scared my husband will try and take my little girls away from me. He has threatened me with it before. I am scared of him. He has said he would put my body in a cornfield. He has shoved me and threatened bodily harm and dragged me through the house by my hair.


I am faking it

I have a chronic condition called Myathenia Gravis. I have had it since I was about 10 and now I am 30. Its main characteristic is greneral muscle weakness all over the body. Because of certain treatment like chemo. I have developed a scarring on my body that stems from spots of infection not healing correctly. Now it looks as though my upper body was an experiment. Its bad. This affects me daily. People dont understand why I have no love in my life and what am I suppoed to say. Who do you think would want to see that everyday? I struggle with depression because of this and even though I have amazing friends and family there is always a distance I know they feel it but can't put there finger on what it is. They all love me and think I am the best thing ever but I am tired of pretending. I am not the happy go lucky guy I pretend to be all the time. I want out of this but nothing changes and I don't see an end to this charade I have built to be my life. I pray for someting to happen.


I do nothing at work

I have to be the laziest employee alive, I hope I don't get myself fired... I don't know what's wrong with me, I just don't ever feel like maintaining files or dealing with piles and piles of repetitious paperwork. I've learned to make it look like I'm doing my job, but I'm two weeks behind on things I'm supposed to do daily, and I haven't updated the personnel files in our small department in a good year or so. I'm only now finishing writing the calendar pages for the month of June... it's the 20th already. Who knows when I'll finish July? I tell myself every day I'll do better tomorrow, but it rarely turns out that way. I don't really know what to do.


falling for a coworker

I've worked here for 4 years. I've felt chemistry with one of my female coworkers from the very beginning. Recently, she has become much more flirty. This change has only intensified my feelings for her. I think about her constantly. Problem is, I'm engaged to a woman I've been with for 8 years. The thought of hurting her kills me. Thinking about my coworker is equally as painful, because I know we can never be together. I sit and think about her for hours. She's perfect in every way, but she'll probably never know how I really feel about her.


ex gf

after three years of commitment, my girlfriend dumped me. so i hacked onto her art site, gave her a bad rep with others, and did the same with her aol account... that stupid idiot should use better passwords.


never gonna happen

your 17 years older than me yet i find myself thinking of you nonstop. when i saw you the other day i was so shocked that i hid. i love you but to u im nothing.


1 month

I remember when I held you close. When time stopped still forever because I took in so much detail about our moment. It became a memory that will last forever in my mind, but when we left each other that memory was no longer enough. For one month, I was hurt by the silence between us. We rarely spoke a full conversation, and it seems, that you might have someone else on your mind. I've lived a life without being human. Then you came and made me feel everything that human beings feel, and it now torments me. I wish I told you what I wanted to say. It's obvious, painful, and right now, true. I want to say good bye, but that would be impossible.


Brandi

I have completely fallen in love with Brandi. I am married, and she has a boyfriend, so it will never happen, but I want to have her for my own.


regrets

I regret everything I have done since, and including, getting out of the military. My life was going perfectly right, and now I struggle with even wanting to live...


BOYs

well... I've been going out with my boyfriend for over a year now, but recently I've made a great friend with this amazing guy. My boyfriend realises that this guy would funnily be a perfect match for me, even more than he is. The problem is, I am always thinking of this other guy and not my boyfriend. This guy can make me laugh and smile a lot more then my boyfriend can. This guy is intelligent, funny, good looking, but also we have the same beliefs. I really am confused, and now, even his friends realise that this guys would be a better boyfriend for me...I don't know what on earth to do! if i break up with my boyfriend then it will break his heart. Should I stay with him? Even if I broke up with my boyfriend to go out with this guy.... so i wouldn't be in a better position, in fact I would be in a worst situation, as it would mean I wouldn't be able to talk to this guy at all! as he is my boyfriends friend... sorry for boring whoever has read this! but, this is my situation and i needed to get this off my chest and out into the open! thanks!


Broke Up

i broke up with this wonderful gf for no good reason. i was a highschool freshmen and she was a senior and i was too stupid to try to stick with her thru college. all my friends think shes bad cuz of various reasons which are all made up. i made them up. i didnt wanna talk about her cuz i missed her so badly. so i told every1 she cheated on me. but i miss her soo much. and i cant tell anybody. she knows i miss her. we hung out a while ago and we cld tell. jst...its not possible and it makes me depressed. i hate college.


death is the end

u know, i wld seriously despise god. but i rele cant. cuz hes a fake. ppl nowadays are soo stupid. heaven?! really? why shld we deserve to go2 heaven?? we are the only things on the planet to ever do anything evil. we create problems, we kill things for sport. we kill each other because we have conciouses. and because of that power christians think there SOO amazing they get to live forever once they die. just by confessing their sins. HA! only thing u can do about a sin is get over it. apologise. fix it. god doesnt care. hes not there. once a person dies their finaly how they shld be. part of nature. we give back what little bit we can for all the damage we have done once we die. theres no heaven to look forward to. the only thing we can do is live life as good as we can now. and be happy with the fact that death is the end. we are returned from where we came from. we will be there forever. and we will never even know.


i still cry

i dont wanna be cocky. but i think im a pretty decent guy. not too hard on the eyes. generally confident. athletic. smarter then most of my class. but with all that i still am torn apart by my ex gf. we broke up almost a year ago. and i still find myself thinking about it n getting all teary eyed. just hearing a song i listened to when we were together. or smelling the perfume she used to wear in a store. it happens everywhere. shes the only thing that ever cld make me cry. and i cant seem to stop. i havnt even seen her for a good 6 months. i dunno what to do. im not sure if i can ever feel the same about another girl. and trust me. iv tried. its just not the same. im so disconnected and spacy about girls now. im not interested in beautifuly shaped school girls walking by. i barely notice when there talking to me. im just not interested anymore. i just think of my ex i cant stop.


ex

i rele loved my ex gf before she moved away. i hated her for nearly 2 years after. but now everything is coming back and i wanna see her and be with her. i get butterflies thinking about her and i havnt had those for years now. and . . . i have a gf. a rele nice one too. i hate myself for this. its so wrong, i feel like im betraying my gfs trust. and im scared to tell any1 in case she finds out.