Ashes to Ashes, Dust to Dust
After church, Johnny tells his parents he has to go and talk
to the minister right away. They agree and the pastor greets
the family.
"Pastor," Johnny says, "I heard you say today that our
bodies came from the dust."
"That's right, Johnny, I did."
"And I heard you say that when we die, our bodies go back to
dust."
"Yes, I'm glad you were listening. Why do you ask?"
"Well you better come over to our house right away and look
under my bed 'cause there's someone either comin' or goin'!"
Billing
A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party.
Their conversation was constantly interrupted by people describing their ailments and asking the doctor for free medical advice.
After an hour of this, the exasperated doctor asked the lawyer, "What do you do to stop people from asking you for legal advice when you're out of the office?"
"I give it to them," replied the lawyer, "and then I send them a bill."
The doctor was shocked, but agreed to give it a try.
The next day, still feeling slightly guilty, the doctor prepared the bills.
When he went to place them in his mailbox, he found a bill from the lawyer.