A Man And His Money
There was a man who had worked all of his life and had saved all of his money and was a real miser when it came to his money.

He loved money more than just about anything.

Just before he died, he said to his wife, "Now listen. When I die, I want you to take all my money and put it in the casket with me. I want to take my money to the afterlife with me.

He made her promise with all her heart that when he died, she would put all of the money in the casket with him.

Well, he died. He was stretched out in the casket, his wife was sitting there in black, and her friend was sitting next to her.

When they finished the ceremony, just before the undertakers got ready to close the casket, the wife said, "Wait just a minute!' She had a box with her, she came over with the box and put it in the casket.

Then the undertakers locked the casket down, and they rolled it away. So her friend said, "Girl, I know you weren't fool enough to put all that money in there with your husband!"

She said, "Listen, I'm a Christian. I can't go back on my word. I promised him that I was gonna put that money in that casket with him.

"You mean to tell me you really put that money in the casket with him!?

"I sure did," said the wife. "I wrote him a check."

Never Underestimate The Intelligence of a Woman.

A guy was driving home one evening...
A guy was driving home one evening when he suddenly realizes that it is his daughter's birthday and that he hasn't bought her anything. Out the corner of his eye he sees a shopping mall. Knowing it was "now or never", he pulls his car through three lanes of traffic, finds a parking bay and runs into the mall. After a frantic search he finds a toy store, goes inside and attracts the attention of a shop assistant. When asked what he would like, he simply says "a Barbie doll". The shop assistant looks at him in the particularly condescending manner that only shop assistants can muster up and asks "Which Barbie would that be, sir?" The man looks surprised so the assistant continues "We have Barbie Goes to the Gym for $19.95, Barbie Goes to the Ball for $19.95, Barbie Goes Shopping for $19.95, Barbie dates Badd Teddy for $19.95, Barbie Goes to the Beach for $19.95, Barbie Goes Night Clubbing for $19.95, Cyber Barbie for $19.95 and Divorced Barbie for $265.00" The man can't help himself and asks "why is Divorced Barbie $265.00 when all the other Barbies are selling for $19.95?" "That's obvious!" says the assistant, "Divorced Barbie comes with Ken's house, Ken's car, Ken's furniture ....