A walking economy
This guy is walking with his friend, who happens to be a psychologist. He says to this friend, "I'm a walking economy."

The friend asks, "How so?"

"My hair line is in recession, my stomach is a victim of inflation, and both of these together are putting me into a deep depression!"

Blind Justice
A young boy asked is father, "Dad, do lawyers ever tell the truth?"

The father thought for a moment, "Yes son, sometimes a lawyer will do anything to win a case!"