A stolen credit card
A man said his credit card was stolen but he decided not to report it because the thief was spending less than his wife did.

And Jesus said unto his disciples...
And Jesus said unto his disciples, "Whom do men say that I am?"And His disciples answered unto Him, "Master, thou art the supreme eschatological manifestation of omnipotent ecclesiastical authority, the absolute, divine, sacerdotal monarch."And Jesus said, "What?"