Dumb.com >> Jokefight
Vote For Your Favorite Joke

I can't decide!

A pastor in Maine skipped services one Sunday...
A pastor in Maine skipped services one Sunday to go bear hunting.Along the trail he turned a corner and collided with a bear. The pastor stumbled, backwards, slipped off the trail, and began tumbling down the mountain, the bear in hot pursuit. Finally the pastor crashed into a bolder, breaking both his legs and sending his rifle flying through the air, just out of his reach. As the bear closed in, the pastor cried out "Lord, I'm sorry for what I have done. Please forgive me and save me! - Lord please make this bear a Christian". Suddenly the bear skipped to a halt at the pastor's feet, fell to it's knees, clasped it's paws together, began to weep and said "God bless this food which I am about to receive!"

A prisoner with skills
Several years ago, Andy was sentenced to prison. During his stay, he got along well with the guards and all his fellow inmates. The warden saw that deep down, Andy was a good person and made arrangements for Andy to learn a trade while doing his time. After three years, Andy was recognized as one of the best carpenters in the local area. Often he would be given a weekend pass to do odd jobs for the citizens of the community.... and he always reported back to prison before Sunday night was over.

The warden was thinking of remodeling his kitchen and in fact had done much of the work himself. But he lacked the skills to build a set of kitchen cupboards and a large counter top which he had promised his wife. So he called Andy into his office and asked him to complete the job for him.

But, alas, Andy refused. He told the warden, "Gosh, I'd really like to help you but counter fitting is what got me into prison in the first place".




Latest Joke Fight Results:

  • Anniversary Flowers was a winner against All the same
  • Bill Gates and General Motors was a winner against Attack Dog
  • A pious man who had reached the age of 105... was a winner against A henpecked husband...
  • A man in the army asks for a pass was a winner against Air Heads
  • Any Last Words? was a winner against A test for being drunk
  • Before and After in Marriage was a winner against
  • Atlanta School Board was a winner against A lawyer's dog, running about
  • A defending attorney was cross examining a coroner... was a winner against A stolen credit card
  • Big Man in a Small Town was a winner against A lawyer returns to his parked BMW to find the headlights...
  • A lawyer passed on and found himself in Heaven... was a winner against A Lutheran pastor, a Catholic priest and a Rabbi...