Dumb.com >> Jokefight
Vote For Your Favorite Joke

I can't decide!

Texting For Seniors
Texting Abbreviations for the Elderly:ATD: At The Doctor's
BFF: Best Friend’s Funeral
BTW: Bring the Wheelchair
BYOT: Bring Your Own Teeth
CBM: Covered By Medicare
CGU: Can’t Get Up
CR: Can't Remember
CUATSC: See You At The Senior Center
DTAF: Don’t Trust A Fart
DWI: Driving While Incontinent
FWBB: Friend with Beta Blockers
FWIW: Forgot Where I Was
FYI: Found Your Insulin
FYI: For Your Indigestion.
GGLKI: Gotta Go, Laxative Kicking In
GGPBL: Gotta Go, Pacemaker Battery Low
GHA: Got Heartburn Again
GOML: Get Off My Lawn
GTG: Got the Gout
HGBM: Had Good Bowel Movement
IMHMO: In My HMO...
IMHO: Is My Hearing-Aid On?
JK: Just Kvetching
LMDO: Laughing My Dentures Out
LOL: Living On Lipitor
LWO: Lawrence Welk’s On
MGAD: My Grandson’s A Doctor
MILF: Meal I'd Like To Forget
OMG: Ouch, My Groin!
OMMR: On My Massage Recliner
OMSG: Oh My! Sorry, Gas.
PIMP: Pooped In My Pants
ROFL CGU: Rolling On The Floor Laughing, and Can’t Get Up
RULKM: Are You Leaving Kids Money?
SGGP: Sorry, Gotta Go Poop
SUS: Speak Up, Sonny
TGIF: Thank Goodness It's Four (Four O'Clock - Early Bird Special)
TLC: Totally Lost Continence
TOT: Texting on Toilet
TTYL: Talk To You Louder
WAITT: Who Am I Talking To?
WIWYA: When I Was Your Age
WTF: Wet the Floor
WTP: Where’s The Prunes?
WWNO: Walker Wheels Need Oil


A recent study showed...
A recent study showed that the average husband only actually speaks to his wife about thirty-seven minutes each week. Well, yeah, I can believe that, I mean just how long does it take to say "Uh-huh" or "Yes dear" or "I'm sorry" ?



Latest Joke Fight Results:

  • Brave Old Firemen was a winner against A Woman's Seminars
  • An attorney was sitting in his office la... was a winner against Can I play the piano once these are off?
  • A Nutty Game was a winner against 7 Word Obituary
  • A Bee at a Bar Mitzvah was a winner against Can you pay the bill?
  • A couple came upon a wishing well... was a winner against Legal Troubles
  • Ashes to Ashes, Dust to Dust was a winner against Company Policy
  • 2 Mexicans was a winner against Baptism Preparations
  • Be Politically Correct With Men was a winner against A tourist wanders into a back-alley antique shop...
  • A man was walking in the street when he heard a voice... was a winner against Application rejections
  • A way to save your marriage was a winner against Age Old Riddle