A precise location
Attorney to witness: "And where was the location of the accident?"Witness: "Approximately milepost 499."Attorney: "And where is milepost 499?"Witness: "About halfway between milepost 498 and milepost 500."

An old drunk stumbles into a confessional...
An old drunk stumbles into a confessional. After not hearing anything for a while the Priest knocked on the wall. The drunk said forget it buddy there's no paper in here either.