A boy comes home from school and tells his mother...
A boy comes home from school and tells his mother that he got a part in the school play. "What part?" the mother asked."I play a Jewish husband," the boy replied. "Go back to school and tell your teacher that you want a speaking role!"

Give a man a fish
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day!