A Bee at a Bar Mitzvah
A hungry bee meets a fellow bee who directs the hungry one
to a Bar Mitzvah. The hungry bee eats his fill, then again
meets his friend.

The second bee asks how it went, and hears that his friend
ate plenty. The second bee then asks why the first bee is
wearing a yarmulke (the small round cap that religious Jews
often wear).

The first bee replies, "It was a Bar Mitzvah. I didn't want
anyone to think I was a WASP."

An offense
Late one Friday night the policeman spotted a man driving very erratically through the streets of Dublin. They pulled the man over and asked him if he had been drinking that evening."Aye, so I have. 'Tis Friday, you know, so me and the lads stopped by the pub where I had six or seven pints. And then there was something called "Happy Hour" and they served these mar-gar-itos which are quite good. I had four or five o' those. Then I had to drive me friend Mike home and O' course I had to go in for a couple of Guiness - couldn't be rude, ye know. Then I stopped on the way home to get another bottle for later .." And the man fumbled around in his coat until he located his bottle of whiskey, which he held up for inspection.The officer sighed, and said, "Sir, I'm afraid I'll need you to step out of the car and take a breathalyzer test."Indignantly, the man said, "Why? Don't ye believe me?!?"