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A Short Time to Live
A man hasn't been fealing well, so he goes to his doctor for a complete checkup.

Afterward the doctor comes out with the results.

"I'm afraid I have some very bad news," the doctor says. "You're dying, and you don't have much time left."

"Oh, that's terrible!" says the man. "How long have I got?"

"Ten," the doctor says sadly.

"Ten?" the man asks. "Ten what? Months? Weeks? What?!"

"Nine..."

Aircraft Carrier
Q: What do you call an aircraft carrier
in financial difficulty?
A: A receding airline.




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  • A man in the army asks for a pass won 50.18% of the times
  • A defendant was on trial for murder. The... won 51.05% of the times