Vote For Your Favorite Joke

A man with a pegleg, hook hand and...
A man with a pegleg, hook hand and an eyepatch went to apply to be a pirate.
Interviewer: How did you get that pegleg?

Pirate: Arrr. I got me leg shot off during the first world war.

Interviewer: How did you get that hook?

Pirate: I got me hand cut off by a big knife.

Interviewer: What about your eyepatch?

Pirate: It was a rainy afternoon and I looked up into the sky and a bird pooped in me eye.

Interviewer: And that put your eye out?

Pirate: No, it was the day after I got me hook.

A father was at the beach with his child...
A father was at the beach with his children when his four-year-old son ran up to him, grabbed his hand, and led him to the shore, where a seagull lay dead in the sand. "Daddy, what happened to him?" the son asked. "He died and went to Heaven," the dad replied. The boy thought a moment and then said, "Did God throw him back down?"

Latest Joke Fight Results:

• A man walked into a gift shop that sold religious items... was a winner against A Nutty Game
• Bob stood over his tee short on the 18th hole... was a winner against A big-game hunter went on safari with his wife...
• How To Annoy People In An Elevator was a winner against A succession of generations
• A very faithful woman was a winner against Barber's don't exist
• Biblical Bumper Stickers was a winner against The Passing of an Old Friend
• Bad Japanese economy was a winner against Bonds Mature
• Bill Gates and General Motors was a winner against Nine Words Women Use
• A site foreman had ten very lazy men working for him... was a winner against African Marriage
• A French guest, staying in a hotel in Edmonton... was a winner against Barber's don't exist
• A Big Glass of Water was a winner against A DIET PRAYER