A Night at the Asylum
Late one night at the insane asylum one inmate shouted, "I am Napoleon!"
Another one said, "How do you know?"

First inmate answers, "Winston Churchill told me!"

Just then, a voice from another room shouted, "I did NOT!"

A little sports match
"...And the halftime score here at the Colleusium is Lions 7,Christians Nothing. We'll be right back after these messages..."