A really cold morning
Two men are meeting on the street."It was very cold this morning.""How cold was it?"I do not no exactly, but I saw a lawyer with his hands in his own pockets."

An accountant is having a hard time sleeping...
An accountant is having a hard time sleeping and goes to see his doctor."Doctor, I just can't get to sleep at night." "Have you tried counting sheep?""That's the problem - I make a mistake and then spend three hours trying to find it."