Vote For Your Favorite Joke

A woman was terribly overweight, so her doctor put her on a diet...
A woman was terribly overweight, so her doctor put her on a diet."I want you to eat regularly for 2 days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for 2 weeks. The next time I see you, you'll have lost at least 5 pounds."When the woman returned, she shocked the doctor by losing nearly 20 pounds."Why, that's amazing!" the doctor said, "Did you follow my instructions?" The woman nodded. "I'll tell you though, I thought I was going to drop dead that third day.""From hunger, you mean?""No, from skipping."

An Unusual Vet
There was once an aspiring veterinarian who put himself through veterinary school working nights as a taxidermist.
Upon graduation, he decided he could combine his two vocations to better serve the needs of his patients and their owners, while doubling his practice and, therefore, his income.

He opened his own offices with a shingle on the door saying, "Dr. Jones, Veterinary Medicine and Taxidermy -- Either way, you get your dog back!"

Latest Joke Fight Results:

• A site foreman had ten very lazy men working for him... was a winner against A lawyer had a jury trial in a very diff...
• Bad News and Good News was a winner against At the first session of a conversion class...
• Texting For Seniors was a winner against A doctor is complaining to a mechanic
• A Nutty Game was a winner against An Unusual Vet
• A dog for a wife was a winner against An Evil Curse
• Bill Gates and General Motors was a winner against A stupid dog
• Texting For Seniors was a winner against A man lay sprawled across three entire seats...
• A man goes to his bank manager and says... was a winner against A man walks into a Chinese restaurant but is told...
• At a jury trial with the jury consisting of 8 men and 4 women... was a winner against A DIET PRAYER
• Barber's don't exist was a winner against An anti-bat spray