15 Ways To Uplift the Workplace
1) Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

2) Find out where your boss shops and buy exactly the same outfits. Wear them one day after your boss does. This is especially effective if your boss is of a different gender than you.

3) Make up nicknames for all your coworkers and refer to them only by these names. "That's a good point, Sparky." "No, I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to disagree with you there, Cha-cha."

4) Send e-mail to the rest of the company telling them exactly what you're doing. For example: "If anyone needs me, I'll be in the bathroom."

5) Hi-Lite your shoes. Tell people you haven't lost them as much since you did this.

6) While sitting at your desk, soak your fingers in Palmolive liquid. Call everyone Madge.

7) Hang mosquito netting around your cubicle. When you emerge to get coffee or a printout or whatever, slap yourself randomly the whole way.

8) Put a chair facing a printer. Sit there all day and tell people you're waiting for your document.

9) Every time someone asks you to do something, anything, ask him or her if they want fries with that.

10) Send e-mail back and forth to yourself engaging yourself in an intellectual debate. Forward the mail to a co-worker and ask her to settle the disagreement.

11) Encourage your colleagues to join you in a little synchronized chair-dancing.

12) Put your trash can on your desk. Label it "IN."

13) Feign an unnatural and hysterical fear of staplers.

14) Send e-mail messages saying there's free pizza or donuts or cake in the lunchroom. When people drift back to work complaining that they found none, lean back, pat your stomach and say, "Oh you've got to be faster than that."

15) Put decaf in the coffee maker for three weeks. Once everyone has withdrawn from caffeine addiction, switch to espresso.

Tongue Twisters
Tongue Twisters

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck
If a woodchuck could chuck wood?
It would chuck as much wood as it could,
And chuck as much wood
As a woodchuck would chuck
If a woodchuck could chuck wood.

Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers,a peck of pickled peppers did Peter Piper pick;if Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers,where's the peck of pickled peppers that Peter Piper picked?Peter Piper, the pickled pepper picker, picked a peck of pickled peppers,a peck of pickled peppers did Peter Piper, the pickled pepper picker pick;if Peter Piper, the pickled pepper picker, picked a peck of pickledpeppers, where's the peck of pickled peppers that Peter Piper, thepickled pepper picker, picked?
 She sells sea shells by the sea shore.The shells she sells are surely seashells.So if she sells shells on the seashore,I'm sure she sells seashore shells. Rural juror  A skunk sat on a stump and thunk the stump stunk, but the stump thunk the skunk stunk.
 Sure the ship's shipshape, sir Freshly-fried flying fish. We surely shall see the sun shine soon  The big black bug's blood ran blue.

Rory the warrior and Roger the worrier were reared wrongly in a rural brewery.

Cedar shingles should be shaved and saved. Black background, brown background.