Automotive horror
As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his car phone rang. Answering, he heard his wife's voice urgently warning him, "Herman, I just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong way on 280. Please be careful!"

"Heck," said Herman, "It's not just one car. It's hundreds of them!"

A French guest, staying in a hotel in Edmonton...
A French guest, staying in a hotel in Edmonton phoned room service for some pepper"Black pepper, or white pepper?" asked the concierge."Toilette pepper!"