A dog for a wife
It was a dark, stormy, night. The Marine was on his firstassignment, and it was guard duty.A General stepped out taking his dog for a walk. The nervousyoung Private snapped to attention, made a perfect salute,and snapped out "Sir, Good Evening, Sir!"The General, out for some relaxation, returned the saluteand said "Good evening soldier, nice night, isn't it?"Well it wasn't a nice night, but the Private wasn't going todisagree with the General, so the he saluted again andreplied "Sir, Yes Sir!".The General continued, "You know there's something about astormy night that I find soothing, it's really relaxing.Don't you agree?"The Private didn't agree, but them the private was just aprivate, and responded "Sir, Yes Sir!"The General, pointing at the dog, "This is a Golden Retriever,the best type of dog to train."The Private glanced at the dog, saluted yet again and said"Sir, Yes Sir!"The General continued "I got this dog for my wife."The Private simply said "Good trade Sir!"

A large difference
A man went to the doctor's. The doctor came in and said,"Well, I've got some good news and some bad news. The bad news is that you have an inoperable brain tumor. The good news is our hospital has just been certified to do brain transplants and there has been an accident right out front and a young couple was killed and you can have whichever brain you'd like. The man's brain costs $100,000.00 and the woman's brain costs "$30,000.00." The patient could not help but ask, "Why such a large difference between the male and the female brain?" The doctor replied, "The female brain is used."