A farmer and his girlfriend...
A farmer and his girlfriend were out for a stroll in the fields when they came across a cow and a calf rubbing noses."Boy," said the farmer, "that sure makes me want to do the same.""Well, go ahead," said his girlfriend. "It's your cow."

Bruce Willis on Mt. Everest
What did Bruce Willis find on the top of Mt. Everest?
Icey dead people.