A wife was berating her husband...
A wife was berating her husband. He motioned for her to quiet down saying, "Don't unleash the beast in me."The wife snickered and replied, "Unlike a lot of women, 'dear', I'm not the least bit afraid of a mouse."

A way to save your marriage
A young husband with an inferiority complex insisted he was just a little pebble on a vast beach.

The marriage counselor, trying to be creative, told him, "If you wish to save your marriage, you'd better be a little boulder."