A missing person
Recently, a distraught wife went to the local police station, along with her next-door neighbor, to report that her husband was missing. The policeman asked for a description of the missing man.
The wife said, "He is 35 years old, 6-foot 4-inches, has dark eyes, dark wavy hair, an athletic build, weighs 185 pounds, is soft-spoken, and is good to the children."
The next-door neighbor protested, "Your husband is 5-foot 8-inches, chubby, bald, has a big mouth, and is mean to your children."
The wife replied, "Yes, but who wants HIM back?"
Silly Dictionary
Arbitrator ar'-bi-tray-ter: A cook that leaves Arby's to work at
McDonald's.Avoidable uh-avoy'-duh-buhl: What a bullfighter tries to do.Burglarize ur'-gler-ize: What a crook sees with.Counterfeiters kown-ter-fit-ers: Workers who put together kitchen
cabinets.Eclipse i-klips': What an English barber does for a living.Eyedropper i'-drop-ur: A clumsy ophthalmologist.Heroes hee'-rhos: What a guy in a boat does.Left Bank left' bangk': What the robber did after his bag was full of
loot.Misty miss'-tee: How golfers create divots.Paradox par'-of-docks: Two physicians.Parasites par'-uh-sites: What you see from the top of the Eiffel Tower.Pharmacist farm'-uh-sist: A helper on the farm.Polarize po'-lur-ize: What penguins see with.Primate pri'-mate: Removing your spouse from in front of the TV.Relief
ee-leaf': What trees do in the spring.Rubberneck
ub'-er-nek: What you do to relax your wife.Seamstress seem'-stress: Describes 250 pounds in a size six.Selfish sel'-fish: What the owner of a seafood store does.Subdued some-dood': Like, a guy, like, who works on one of those, like,
submarines, man.Sudafed soo'-da-fed: Bringing litigation against a government official.