Legal Troubles
"How can I ever thank you?" gushed a woman to Clarence Darrow, after he had solved her legal troubles.

"My dear woman," Darrow replied, "ever since the Phoenicians invented money there has been only one answer to that question."

Be Quiet in Church
A Sunday school teacher asked her little children, as they
were on the way to church service, "And why is it necessary
to be quiet in church?"

One bright little girl replied, "Because people are
sleeping!"