Vote For Your Favorite Joke

Burglars just broke in
An elderly woman had just returned to her home from an evening of religious service when she was startled by an intruder. As she caught the man in the act of robbing her home of its valuables, she yelled, "Stop! Acts 2:38!" [Turn from your sin]

The burglar stopped dead in his tracks. Then the woman calmly called the police and explained what she had done.

As the officer cuffed the man to take him in, he asked the burglar,"Why did you just stand there? All the old lady did was yell a scripture at you."

"Scripture?" replied the burglar, "She said she had an axe and two 38s!"

A man took his wife to the doctors...
A man took his wife to the doctors. After a short examination the doctor said"Your wife's mind has completely gone!"To which the man replied "I'm not surprised. She's been giving a piece of it to me every day for the past 25 years!"

Latest Joke Fight Results:

• Funny Words of Wisdom was a winner against How To Be Politically Correct With Women
• Business one-liners 08 was a winner against Boys and Girls
• An engineer, doctor, and pastor golfing was a winner against A recruit who wasn't really meant to be a soldier...
• Barber's don't exist was a winner against Company Policy
• A guy in a bar was a winner against An Unusual Prayer
• A certain lawyer was was a winner against Billy Gates writes to Santa
• Facing Adversity was a winner against Bottle of Evian water?
• A bad habit was a winner against A Lucky Break
• Actual Answer from a Medical Student was a winner against A Woman's Seminars
• A Night Before Christmas For Moms was a winner against A blonde bought an AM radio and it took her a month to find out she could listen to it at night.