A visitor from Holland was chatting with his American...
A visitor from Holland was chatting with his American friend and was jokingly explaining about the red, white and blue in the Netherlands flag. "Our flag symbolizes our taxes," he said. "We get red when we talk about them, white when we get our tax bill, and blue after we pay them." "That's the same with us," the American said, "only we see stars, too."

A fair deal
A friend of mine just got divorced. He and his ex-wife split the house. He got the outside.