Cannibals and Politicians
A cannibal was walking through the jungle and came upon a restaurant opened by a fellow cannibal. Feeling somewhat hungry, he sat down and looked over the menu...

Broiled Missionary: $25.00
Fried Explorer: $35.00
Baked Politician: $100.00.

The cannibal called the waiter over and asked , "Why such a price difference for the politician?"

The cook replied "Have you ever tried to clean one of them?"

Bathtub Seizure
Q: What do you do if someone's having a seizure in a bathtub?
A: Throw in a load of laundry.