Blonde in Pain
There was a blonde who was hurting all over so she went to the doctor. The doctor said, ''Where are you hurting?''

She said, ''Everywhere. See?"

She touched her arm and said, "OUCH!"

She touched her leg and, "OUCH!"

She touched her nose, "OUCH!"

"See?" she cried, " I am hurting all over!''

The doctor laughed and said, ''What you've got is a broken index finger!"

An Unusual Vet
There was once an aspiring veterinarian who put himself through veterinary school working nights as a taxidermist.
Upon graduation, he decided he could combine his two vocations to better serve the needs of his patients and their owners, while doubling his practice and, therefore, his income.

He opened his own offices with a shingle on the door saying, "Dr. Jones, Veterinary Medicine and Taxidermy -- Either way, you get your dog back!"