A rabbi, a priest, and a lawyer were all...
A rabbi, a priest, and a lawyer were all caught in a shipwreck. Naturally, there are a lot of sharks circling around. All of a sudden, one shark darts in and grabs the priest for lunch. No more priest.
The rabbi starts praying frantically, but to no avail, as a shark comes in and eats him, too.
Now the lawyer is really worried, as a shark is coming for him. But, miracle of miracles, the shark puts him on its back, carries him to shore, and lets him off.
The lawyer, curious, waits till the shark is far enough away not to eat him, and asks, "How come you didnt eat me?" And the shark replies, "Professional Courtesy!"
Bad Investment
Shultz, a lawyer, bribed a man on the jury to hold out for a charge of manslaughter, as opposed to the charge of murder which was brought by the prosecution.
The jury was out for nearly a week before they returned to court with the manslaughter verdict.
When Shultz paid the juror, he asked him if it had been hard to persuade the other jurors to get the charge of manslaughter.
"Sure did," the juror replied, "all the others wanted to acquit him."