A man in the army asks for a pass
An Israeli soldier who just enlisted asked the
Commanding Officer for a 3-day pass.
The CO says "Are you crazy? You just joined the
Israeli army, and you already want a 3-day pass?
You must do something spectacular for that
recognition!"
So the soldier comes back a day later in an
Arab tank!
The CO was so impressed, he asked, "How
did you do it?"
"Well, I jumped in a tank, and went toward the
border with the Arabs. I approached the border,
and saw an Arab tank. I put my white flag up,
the Arab tank put his white flag up. I said to the
Arab soldier, "Do you want to get a 3-day pass?
So we exchanged tanks!"
Actual Business Signs In USA
In the offices of a loan company: "Ask about our plans for owning your home."
In a classified ad: "Tired of cleaning yourself? Let me do it."
In a New York medical building: "Mental Health Prevention Center"
On a New York convalescent home: "For the sick and tired of the Episcopal Church."
Outside a country shop: "We buy junk and sell antiques."
In the window of an Oregon store: "Why go elsewhere and be cheated when you can come here?"
In a classified ad: "Vacation special: Have your home exterminated. Get rid of aunts."