An accountant is having a hard time sleeping...
An accountant is having a hard time sleeping and goes to see his doctor."Doctor, I just can't get to sleep at night." "Have you tried counting sheep?""That's the problem - I make a mistake and then spend three hours trying to find it."

After many years of trying to find steady work...
After many years of trying to find steady work I finally got a job as a historian until I realized there was no future in it.