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Bad computer viruses
Economic computer viruses

INTEREST GROUP ECONOMIST VIRUS - Divides your hard disk into hundreds of little units, each of which does practically nothing, but all of which claim to be the most important part of the computer.

ECONOMETRICIAN VIRUS - Sixty percent of the PCs infected will lose 38 percent of their data 14 percent of the time (plus or minus a 3.5 percent margin of

POLITICAL THINK TANK ECONOMIST VIRUS - Doesn't do anything, but you can't get rid of it until next election.

GOVERNMENT ECONOMIST VIRUS - nothing works on your system, but all your diagnostic software says everything is just fine.

MARXIAN ECONOMIST VIRUS - Helps your computer shut down whenever it wants to.

SOVIET ECONOMIST VIRUS - Crashes your computer, but denies it ever happened.

MAINSTREAM ECONOMIST VIRUS - It claims it feels threatened by the other files on your PC and erases then in "self-defense."

CENTRAL BANK ECONOMIST VIRUS - Makes sure that it's bigger than any other file.

MULTINATIONAL CORPORATION ECONOMIST VIRUS - Deletes all monetary files, but keeps smiling and sending messages about how the economy is going to get better.

SUPPLY SIDE ECONOMIST VIRUS - Puts your computer to sleep for four years. When your computer wakes up, you're trillion more dollars in debt.

ENVIRONMENTAL ECONOMIST VIRUS - Before allowing you to delete any file, it first asks you if you've considered the alternatives

Sniglets - Words That Should Exist
Words That Should Exist But Don't==================================
 Snackmosphere - The 95% air inside bags of potato chips.  Ohnosecond - That very short moment in time during which you realize that you have pressed the wrong key and deleted hours, days, or weeks of work.  Eiffelites - Gangly people sitting in front of you at the movies who, no matter which direction you lean in, follow suit.  Meganegabar - The line you put on a check to prevent someone else from adding "and a million dollars."  Frust - The small line of debris that refuses to be swept onto the dust pan and keeps backing a person across the room until he finally decides to give up and sweep it under the rug.  Petrophobic - One who is embarrassed to undress in front of a household pet.  Snork - To spew what you're drinking or chewing in a fit of sudden laughter.  Cylences - long gaps in a phone conversation that occur because one person is also reading email, IMing or shopping online.  Accordianated - Being able to drive and re-fold a road map at the same time.  Exhaustipated - Being so tired that when you try to speak, nothing comes out right.  Testlosterone - The hormone that prevents men from stopping and asking for directions.  Refunable – Something you enjoyed so much you’d do it again.  Treeware - Documents made out of paper, as opposed to electronic documents.  Disconfect - To sterilize the piece of candy you dropped on the floor by blowing on it, somehow assuming this will remove all the germs.  Newtrons - The magnetized particles that amazingly hold Fig Newtons together.  Prairiedogged - The feeling of helplessness you get when co-workers in neighboring cubicles constantly pop their heads up to ask you stupid questions.  Aqualibrium - The point where the stream of drinking fountain water is at its perfect height, thus relieving the drinker from (A) having to suck the nozzle, or (B) squirting themself in the eye/ear.  Blamestorming - Sitting around in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed and who was responsible.  Elecelleration - The mistaken notion that the more you press an elevator button the faster it will arrive.  Mallmanac - In a mall, the giant maze with blocks and numbers on it, otherwise known as the "Directory".  Hereoglyph - A little stick figure on a mallmanac that tells where you are.  Peppier - The waiter at a fancy restaurant whose sole purpose seems to be walking around asking diners if they want ground pepper.  Phonesia - The affliction of dialing a phone number and forgetting whom you were calling just as they answer.  Aeroma - The odor emanating from an exercise room after an aerobics class.  Dimp - A person who insults you in a cheap department store by asking, "Do you work here?"  Dessertification - The act of eating less than the entire meal, in order to "save room for dessert".  Kirby - A Small but repulsive piece of food prominently attached to a person's face or clothing.  Zen mail - an email message that arrives with no text in it.  Klong - The sudden overwhelming feeling of fear and panic when you feel that everything is going well and you have plenty of time and you suddenly remember there was someplace else VERY important that you are supposed to be RIGHT NOW, and it's nobody's fault but your own that you aren't there.  Snee - A sneeze that doesn't completely execute. You feel your nose tingling and you start inhaling, anticipating the forceful thrust of air and saliva that is expected, but it never materializes. 



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