Dumb.com >> Jokefight
Vote For Your Favorite Joke

I can't decide!

Are caterpillars good to eat?
Johnny: Daddy, are caterpillars good to eat?

Father: Have I not told you never to mention such things during meals!

Mother: Why did you say that, Junior? Why did you ask the question?

Johnny: It's because I saw one on daddy's lettuce, but now it's gone.

A story behind a gun
Big Louie the Torpedo was becoming increasingly curious about one of the newer members of his mob, Benny the Rod. Benny had been in the business for many years in another part of the country. During that time he had garnered quite a reputation for being the most conscientious and honorable hit man available. He was also considered quite eccentric, perhaps odd, in that for the last ten years or so he always kept one hand in his pocket - clutching his cold steel weapon in readiness (hence the nickname, Benny the Rod).

When Benny arrived at Louie's office, the question was put to him.

"So what's the story with you and this here gun of yours, eh? Like, are you scared or somethin' or you just want to always be ready or what?"

"Not scared ..." Benny growled, "been doin' it dis way ever since me sister-in-law's weddin' 'bout ten ten years ago now".

"Oh yeah? ... so ...?"

"Well, I used ta know her fiance at da time - a no good chisler. He never even loved the goil so much ... but he made her happy and so I kept me mouth shut about it", Benny explained.

Louie leaned in, expecting the point of the matter.

"And since dat time I gotta do it dis way".

"But WHY?!", Louie finally demanded?

"Well, I was at da wedding", grumbled Benny, and I wasn't about to say nuttin' about it then, so now I gotta do like da preacher said ...

"Speak Now or Forever Hold Your Piece!"




Latest Joke Fight Results:

  • A guy is down on his luck. He takes his last $500... was a winner against Barber's don't exist
  • A customer at Green's Gourmet Grocery ma... was a winner against A guy bought his wife a beautiful diamond ring for...
  • Bill Gates and General Motors was a winner against A man went to the police station wishing to speak...
  • On The Job Wisdom was a winner against Build an Ark
  • An ancient Irishman was a winner against An Unusual Vet
  • A guy bought his wife a beautiful diamond ring for... was a winner against 2 Mexicans
  • Bad computer viruses was a winner against
  • Business one-liners 08 was a winner against An old occupation
  • Bad Couch Trip was a winner against A lawyer and two friends, a Rabbi and a Hindu holy man...
  • Funny News Headlines was a winner against A really cold morning