A stolen credit card
A man said his credit card was stolen but he decided not to report it because the thief was spending less than his wife did.

A man took his wife to the doctors...
A man took his wife to the doctors. After a short examination the doctor said"Your wife's mind has completely gone!"To which the man replied "I'm not surprised. She's been giving a piece of it to me every day for the past 25 years!"