Can I play the piano once these are off?
A doctor has come to see one of his patients in a hospital. The patient has had major surgery to both of his hands.

"Doctor," says the man excitedly and dramatically holds up his heavily bandaged hands. "Will I be able to play the piano when these bandages come off?"

"I don't see why not," replies the doctor.

"That's funny," says the man. "I wasn't able to play it before."

Bang Bang!
Q: What goes, "clip clop, clip clop, bang! bang! bang!
clippity clop, clippity clop?"

A: A drive by shooting in an amish neighborhood!