3 men in Saudi
An American, a Dutchman and a Frenchman are in Saudi Arabia, sharing a smuggled crate of booze.
Then Saudi police rush in and arrest them.
The mere possession of alcohol is a severe offense in Saudi Arabia.
For the terrible crime of actually being caught consuming the booze, they are all sentenced to death!
However, after many months and with the help of very good lawyers, they are able to successfully appeal their sentences down to life imprisonment.
By a stroke of luck, it was a Saudi national holiday the day their trial finished.
The extremely benevolent Sheikh decided they could be released after receiving just 20 lashes each with a whip.
As they were preparing for their punishment, the Sheikh announced: "It's my first wife's birthday today, and she has asked me to allow each of you one wish before your whipping."
The Dutchman was first in line, he thought for a while and then said: "Please tie a pillow to my back."
This was done, but the pillow only lasted 10 lashes before the whip went through. When the punishment was done he had to be carried away bleeding and crying with pain.
The Frenchman was next up. After watching the Dutchman in horror he said smugly: "Please fix two pillows to my back."
But even two pillows could only take 15 lashes before the whip went through again and the Frenchman was soon led away whimpering loudly.
The American was the last one up, but before he could say anything, the Sheikh turned to him and said: "You are from a most beautiful part of the world and your culture is one of the finest in the world. For this, you may have two wishes!"
"Thank you, your Most Royal and Merciful highness," the American replied. "In recognition of your kindness, my first wish is that you give me not 20, but 100 lashes."
"Not only are you an honorable, handsome and powerful man, you are also very brave." The Sheikh said with an admiring look on his face.
"If 100 lashes is what you desire, then so be it. And your second wish, what is it to be?" the Sheikh asked.
The American replied: "Tie the Frenchman to my back."
Submitted by Yisman
Edited by Curtis
Funny Signs
Funny Signs:
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At a Budapest zoo - Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty.
Detour sign in Kyushi, Japan - Stop - Drive Sideways.
From a Japanese information booklet about using a hotel air conditioner - Cooles and Heates - If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself.
From the Soviet Weekly - There will be a Moscow Exhibition of Arts by 15,000 Soviet Republic painters and sculptors. These were executed over the past two years.
In a Bangkok dry cleaners - Drop your trousers here for best results.
In a Bucharest hotel lobby - The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable.
In a Copenhagen airline ticket office - We take your bags and send them in all directions.
In a hotel in Athens, Greece - Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11 AM daily.
In a Japanese hotel room - Please to bathe inside the tub.
In a Paris hotel elevator - Please leave your values at the front desk.
In a Rhodes, Greece tailor shop - Order your summers suit. Because is big rush we will execute customers in strict rotation.
In a Swiss mountain inn - Special today -- no ice cream.
In a Tokyo Hotel - Is forbitten to steal hotel towels please. If you are not person to do such thing is please not to read notis.
In a Tokyo shop - Our nylons cost more than common, but you'll find they are best in the long run.
In an Acapulco hotel - The manager has personally passed all the water served here.
In an advertisement by a Hong Kong dentist - Teeth extrcted by the latest Methodists.
In an East African newspaper - A new swimming pool is rapidly taking shape since the contractors have thrown in the bulk of their workers.
In the window of a Swedish furrier - Fur coats made for ladies from their own skin.
On the menu of a Swiss restaurant - Our wines leave you nothing to hope for.
Outside a Hong Kong tailor shop - Ladies may have a fit upstairs.
Sign from a Majorcan shop entrance - English well talking