A man walked into
A man walked into the local Chamber of Commerce of a small town, obviously desperate. Seeing a man at the counter, the stranger asks, ''Is there a criminal attorney in town?''

To which the man behind the counter immediately quipped, ''Yes, but we can't prove it yet!''

A stolen credit card
A man said his credit card was stolen but he decided not to report it because the thief was spending less than his wife did.