I tried to be a tailor...
I tried to be a tailor, but I just wasn't suited for it. Mainly because it was a so-so job.

A guy bought his wife a beautiful diamond ring for...
A guy bought his wife a beautiful diamond ring for Christmas. A friend of his said, "I thought she wanted one of those sporty 4-Wheel drive vehicles." "She did," he replied. "But where in the hell was I gonna finda fake Jeep?"