Vote For Your Favorite Joke

12 Shots
A guy goes into a bar, orders twelve shots and starts drinking them as fast as he can.
The bartender says, "Dang, why are you drinking so fast?"

The guy says, "You would be drinking fast if you had what I had."

The bartender says, "What do you have?"

The guy says, "75 cents."

Bad News and Good News
Jill phoned her husband, John, at work for a chat. "I'm sorry dear," said John, "but I'm up to my neck in work today. I don't have time to chat."

Jill replied, "But I've got some good news and some bad news for you, dear."

"OK darling," said John, "but as I've got no time right now, just give me the good news."

"Okay," agreed Jill. "Well, the air bag works...bye!"

Latest Joke Fight Results:

• A precise location was a winner against
• 747 Full of Lawyers was a winner against A blonde bought an AM radio and it took her a month to find out she could listen to it at night.
• An ode to old age was a winner against 3 men in Saudi
• Baptism Preparations was a winner against A customer sent an order to a distributor...
• A Short Time to Live was a winner against 40th Birthday
• 10 Things You Never Hear in Church was a winner against A pious man who had reached the age of 105...
• A sailor goes to a cementary was a winner against Atlanta School Board
• Bambi was a winner against A very homely young woman made an appointment with a psychiatrist...
• Bob stood over his tee short on the 18th hole... was a winner against An honest lawyer
• A Bee at a Bar Mitzvah was a winner against A man took his wife to the doctors...