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An ode to old age
There's quite an art to falling apart as the years go by,
And life doesn't begin at 40. That's a big fat lie.
My hair's getting thinner, my body is not;
The few teeth I have are beginning to rot.

I smell of Vick's-Vapo-Rub, not Chanel # 5;
My new pacemaker's all that keeps me alive.
When asked of my past, every detail I'll know,
But what was I doing 10 minutes ago?

Well, you get the idea, what more can I say?
I'm off to read the obituary, like I do every day;
If my names not there, I'll once again start -
Perfecting the art of falling apart


A Man's Life is Spent Wondering
The average man's life consists of twenty years of having
his mother ask him where he is going; forty years of having
his wife ask the same question; and at the end, the mourners
wondering too!



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You can see the results below:


  • Men vs. Women won 48.55% of the times
  • A guy in a bar won 51.29% of the times