Airplane Trouble
An airliner was having engine trouble, and the pilot instructed the cabin crew to have the passengers take their seats and get prepared for an emergency landing.

A few minutes later, the pilot asked the flight attendants if everyone was buckled in and ready.

"All set back here, Captain," came the reply, "except one lawyer who is still going around passing out business cards."

A housewife, an accountant
A housewife, an accountant and a lawyer were asked ''How much is 2 plus 2?''

The housewife replies: ''Four!''

The accountant says: ''I think it's either 3 or 4. Let me run those figures through my spreadsheet one more time.''

The lawyer pulls the drapes, dims the lights and asks in a hushed voice, ''How much do you want it to be?''