Biblical Bumper Stickers
Adam: "You are what you eat."

Eve: "At least he doesn't compare me to his mother."

Abraham: "I'm goin' not knowin'."

Noah: "Honk if you believe in treading water."

Moses: "From a basket case to the promise land."

Elizah: "When Jezebel ain't happy, ain't nobody happy."

Balaam: "My second donkey talks!"

Prodigal Son: "All roads lead to home."

At the Sinai desert: "Winding road next 40 years"

At the Red Sea: "Caution! Subject to sudden flooding"

40th Birthday
A middle-aged guy is out to dinner with his wife to celebrate her 40th birthday. He says, "So what would you like, Sherry? A Jaguar? A sable coat? A diamond necklace?"

She said, "I want a divorce."

He replied in shock, "I wasn't planning on spending that much."