A man phones a mental hospital and asks the receptionist...
A man phones a mental hospital and asks the receptionist if there is anybody in room 27. She goes and checks, and comesback to the phone, telling him No, the room is empty. "Good," says the man. "That means I must have really escaped."

An Unusual Prayer
Little Anne had been exceedingly naughty and during the
dinner hour she was forced to eat alone in the corner at a
card table. When everyone was seated, Father bowed his head
and gave thanks.

Then little Anne gravely bowed her head and said "Thank You
Dear Lord, for preparing a table before me in the presence of
my enemies."