Vote For Your Favorite Joke

A Short Time to Live
A man hasn't been fealing well, so he goes to his doctor for a complete checkup.

Afterward the doctor comes out with the results.

"I'm afraid I have some very bad news," the doctor says. "You're dying, and you don't have much time left."

"Oh, that's terrible!" says the man. "How long have I got?"

"Ten," the doctor says sadly.

"Ten?" the man asks. "Ten what? Months? Weeks? What?!"

"Nine..."

Bad Japanese economy
According to inside contacts, the Japanese banking crisis shows no signs of ameliorating. If anything, it's getting worse.

Following last week's news that Origami Bank had folded, we are hearing that Sumo Bank has gone belly up, and Bonsai Bank plans to cut back some of its branches. Karaoke Bank is up for sale, and it is (you guessed it!) going for a song.

Meanwhile, shares in Kamikaze Bank have nose-dived, and 500 back-office staff at Karate Bank got the chop. Analysts report that there is something fishy going on at Sushi Bank, and staff there fear they may get a raw deal.

Latest Joke Fight Results:

• Anniversary Flowers was a winner against All the same
• Bill Gates and General Motors was a winner against Attack Dog
• A pious man who had reached the age of 105... was a winner against A henpecked husband...
• A man in the army asks for a pass was a winner against Air Heads
• Any Last Words? was a winner against A test for being drunk
• Before and After in Marriage was a winner against
• Atlanta School Board was a winner against A lawyer's dog, running about
• A defending attorney was cross examining a coroner... was a winner against A stolen credit card
• Big Man in a Small Town was a winner against A lawyer returns to his parked BMW to find the headlights...
• A lawyer passed on and found himself in Heaven... was a winner against A Lutheran pastor, a Catholic priest and a Rabbi...