A man with a glass eye is here to see you
Nurse: Doctor, there is a man in the waiting room with a glass eye named Brown.

Doctor: What does he call his other eye?

A couple have not been getting along for years...
A couple have not been getting along for years, so the husband thinks,"I'll buy my wife a cemetery plot for her birthday."Well, you can imagine her disappointment. The next year, her birthday rolls around again and thistime he doesn't get her anything.She says, "Why didn't you get me a birthday present!?"He replies, "You didn't use what I got you last year!"