A Lutheran pastor, a Catholic priest and a Rabbi...
A Lutheran pastor, a Catholic priest and a Rabbi were fishing from a boat not from the lake shore. The pastor had to make a trip to the port-a-potty located on the shore, so he got out of the boat, walked across the water and in the same matter, came back to the boat after he was finished. A little later, the priest had to make the trip also. He got out of the boat, walked across the water, visited the bathroom and in the same manner, came back to the boat. Still later, the rabbi needed to go ashore. He got out of the boat and immediately sank. The pastor looked at the priest and said,"Do you think we ought to tell him where the rocks are?"

A housewife, an accountant
A housewife, an accountant and a lawyer were asked ''How much is 2 plus 2?''

The housewife replies: ''Four!''

The accountant says: ''I think it's either 3 or 4. Let me run those figures through my spreadsheet one more time.''

The lawyer pulls the drapes, dims the lights and asks in a hushed voice, ''How much do you want it to be?''