Vote For Your Favorite Joke

A man with a pegleg, hook hand and...
A man with a pegleg, hook hand and an eyepatch went to apply to be a pirate.
Interviewer: How did you get that pegleg?

Pirate: Arrr. I got me leg shot off during the first world war.

Interviewer: How did you get that hook?

Pirate: I got me hand cut off by a big knife.

Interviewer: What about your eyepatch?

Pirate: It was a rainy afternoon and I looked up into the sky and a bird pooped in me eye.

Interviewer: And that put your eye out?

Pirate: No, it was the day after I got me hook.

4 Doctors
Four surgeons were taking a coffee break and were discussing their work.

The first said, "I think accountants are the easiest to operate on. You open them up and everything inside is numbered."

The second said, "I think librarians are the easiest to operate on. You open them up and everything inside is in alphabetical order."

The third said, "I like to operate on electricians. You open them up and everything inside is color-coded."

The fourth one said, "I like to operate on lawyers. They're heartless, spineless, gutless, and their heads and their asses are interchangeable."

Latest Joke Fight Results:

• A big-game hunter went on safari with his wife... was a winner against
• A housewife, an accountant was a winner against Business one-liners 08
• 100 Camels was a winner against Bees Pees
• A bus station is where a bus stops... was a winner against A woman had some problems, so she went to her doctor...
• At night court, a man was brought in and set... was a winner against Bob stood over his tee short on the 18th hole...
• A woman entered the hospital to deliver her 15th child... was a winner against A sudden change of mind
• A recruit who wasn't really meant to be a soldier... was a winner against Always By My Side
• Boys and Girls was a winner against I tried to be a tailor...
• A man walked into a gift shop that sold religious items... was a winner against A man and his Alligator
• Work vs. Prison was a winner against An Unusual Vet